This Key is about a subtle blind spot that sabotaged Jim and many other high performers. Unlock this insight and set yourself free to discover your leadership path. We’ll be glad to hear from you with your comments, as well as your leadership development needs. Please feel free to forward the Key to friends, family and associates.

Jim suffered a major blind spot many managers struggle with. He failed to realize that his ability to get things done blinded him from seeing what was even more important. Jim’s blind spot was not recognizing that true success and leadership lie somewhere else: It is not what you do; it is your way of being when you do it.


Do They Trust You

Other people respond not just to what you do, but to your way of being and your intentions and motives. They come to trust and believe in you more because of how you are than the results you get. It’s your way of being as you work to achieve results they learn to trust. And they don’t always remember what you say to them, but they never forget how you make them feel.

The essence of leadership is not what you do – it is your way of being when you do it, which is an expression of your intention, reasons, values and the way you relate to other people.

Your way of leading

Here are some questions to reflect on to help you gain insight to your way of being and therefore your way of leading:

1. Are you having fun doing what you do? Or is it an impossible chore? Where are you on the scale in between these two positions?


2. If zero is holding back with a mean spirit and ten is full of positive energy and openly ready to engage, where are you on the scale between these two points?

3. Are you quick to blame and deflect issues to others or do you step up to take responsibility and ownership?

4. How do you approach the world? Is it a jungle full of threats; a place to work hard and play hard, or a stage to manifest dreams? What is your metaphor for engaging in the world?

5. How do you see the people around you? Are they objects that either interfere with or help you? Are they people like you with desires, concerns, fears and hopes? Is it a little bit of both?

6. Are you always at high pressure and busy or do you make yourself available and approachable?

7. Do you appreciate people for what they are and create a space in which they can evolve and grow?

8. Do you trust first until persuaded otherwise? Or do you begin on the basis of distrust, needing to take people through 27 tests before you decide they can be trusted?

9. Are you fair and do you encourage fairness and decency?

10. Are you finding more often than not that helping and serving people’s higher interest is the best way to serve your own higher self interest?

Jim’s blind spot was not recognizing the invisible side of leadership: It is not what you do; It is your way of being when you do it.

Reflect and act

Here are seven things you can do to uplift the invisible side of your leadership:

1. Practice awareness about your inner state of being.

2. Focus on the one or two major opportunities each day.

3. Discover what situations tend to cause you to blame others and justify yourself. Make the shift to being present and at the point, free of the need to justify.

4. Practice centering yourself by taking a few deep breaths and relaxing for a moment.

5. Practice seeing others as people like you. Ask yourself: What are their hopes? What are their concerns? How can I help them to be the best they can be?

6. Determine to begin your day with focusing on what energizes you and makes you happy and grateful.

7. Commit to a life long journey of personal growth to develop finer awareness and knowledge of self.

 

I am often asked towards the end of a four or five day seminar, “How can I sustain what I have learned here?” Typically this is an indication that the person has found new insights which they want to act on and not lose. The new self-knowledge and insight may consist of a clear set of values, appreciation of personal strengths, a new leadership strategy, how to better enable and develop their team, new appreciation about building trustful relationships, a clear set of goals, a determination to better align short and long term intentions, or something else. They ask how to sustain it because they instinctively feel that the pressure system they are returning to will be challenging. They fear losing the precious clarity they gained while in the seminar when faced with returning to the demands of their busy lives.

I usually reply with the five step success strategy for everything:

1. First, you have to be driven. If you are not driven with a great intensity the other four steps will not be enough.


2. Second, you’ve got to design your environment to support your success. Build into your life reminders, support mechanisms and rituals to help you stay on course.


3. Third, have a coach or a buddy to help you stay accountable to your decisions and personal commitments.


4. Create or join a mastermind support group with people whose endeavor is on a similar path with intentions and objectives that resonate with yours.


5. Attend an annual retreat, seminar, development opportunity to gain further knowledge and insight.

These five steps are the foolproof strategy for sustainable success.

© Aviv Shahar